The End of an Era

I planned to do my usual posting tonight about what has been going on in the campaign, to rant and rave about the hard lessons of politics that I am learning, and to mention those I need to thank. There are quite a few people who need to be thanked for their support and love. But, something happened today that made me put some things into perspective.

This is a story about Edith, Guy, Bernard, and Bettie Playforth, four siblings whose lives would make a great movie. They were all gorgeous in their day (they had these piercing blue eyes) and lived through good and bad times, war, babies, heartbreak, and tragedy. They made a real mark on their families and friends and the last one of them died today. Thus, the end of an era is upon us.

I never knew Bernard. He and Guy were twins and I think he died before I was born. But the other 3 I recall quite well. This story is theirs as I remember it. Some parts or facts I may not have exactly right. But, I know that the truth of their character, love, wit and enthusiasm is solid. I write this blog as a tribute to them all, but especially to my grandma #1, Edie and grandma #2, Betts.

One person who has always supported and love me is my Great Aunt, Bettie Jean Cornett (my beloved "Aunt Betts" or "Grandma Aunt Boots" as I began to call her after my real grandmother died). At 3:35 this afternoon, she drew her last, hard breath at the age of 78. Although she was my great aunt, she was more like a second grandmother. Her sister, Edith Padgett (sug, short for sugar), was my dad's mother and passed away a while ago when I was in school at Morehead State. My Grandma was the first person I really loved and felt close to that ever died and I was greatly affected by it. She suffered for a long time and I sometimes dream about her and think she kinda leads me in the right direction from above. I am blessed that Aunt Betts was there to carry on her legacy for me.

These ladies were both so influential in my life. I can't imagine that anyone has been as lucky as I have been to have them. They were both hilarious. They lived right next door to each other on Andalusia Lane in Valley Station. Aunt Betts had 3 children that she dedicated her life to. In a way, she really had 4 children. My dad, her nephew, was like her own. She was just a teenager when he was born. She used to tell me how she would cut school and eventually quit completely to go get him as a baby and spend all her time with him. I believe she even snuck him off to an Elvis concert once upon a time.

Aunt Betts had 3 kids of her own, Ricky, Vickie, and Kim. This is the part of her life where her faith and happy heart become so apparent. Ricky was born healthy, but then just after he was born, he stopped breathing. My Uncle Guy, (grandma & aunt Betts' brother) saved his life and resuscitated him. The time he went without oxygen however affected him to the point that he had cerebral palsy. He can walk and communicate (if you know how to decode his "language"). He cannot dress, feed or clean himself. She later gave birth to Vickie, who was also born healthy. At 9 years old, Vickie had a brain tumor on one side of her brain. Vickie survived the tumor, but has obviously affected speech and mobility. One side of her body is paralyzed, so she also needs help taking care of herself. Aunt Betts took care of them until they both moved to an assisted living home just a few years ago. It broke Aunt Betts' heart for a long time that she couldn't take care of those "kids" anymore and they had to go live somewhere else. She lived her whole life around them and I think she felt like she abandoned them, even though she was well into her 70's and in bad health before she was finally convinced they had to go live somewhere else.

Kimberly, her youngest daughter, was born healthy and normal and has also had to bare the burden of taking care of her siblings. Aunt Betts loved Kim and her two boys, Seth and Kyle, like nothing you have ever known. Her dedication to all these kids and her husband, my uncle Dick, were a true inspiration to all who met her. She always had a smile on her face, joking, praising God, and just acting like a fool. Anytime I thought my life was hard, I looked at Aunt Betts and all the things she had gone through and knew that I had it pretty good!

All that being said, my Aunt Betts would want me to focus on happy things. She was very religious and strong in her love and faith in God, so I know she is in a much happier place where she doesn't gasp for every breath with an oxygen tank in her nose. She is no longer bent over from osteoporosis in Heaven, I just feel sure of it.

Her impact on her kids and those she touched is obvious. But, I would be remiss if I failed to mention what she meant to me. I had a wonderful childhood partly because of her. I would spend most of my summers, spring breaks and Christmas breaks as a little girl running back and forth between their houses. Her husband, my Uncle Dick, was a big ol' gruff teddy bear who called me "Tasmanian devil" because I ran around so wildly all the time. He would sit in the living room with no shirt on and smoke Camels with no filters. He would call her "woman" and his "old lady." He worked at Fort Knox for as long as I can remember. Aunt Betts was crazy about him and frankly, so was I. He let me snuggle up close to him and eat out of his plate. People always thought that was amazing from this gruff guy who really had a heart of gold. He died when I was in college also. My heart was broken and Aunt Betts never stopped loving or talking about him for a second.

In those fun days of running back and forth between their houses we would stay up all night, playing Skip-Bo cards as partners. They would let me drink coffee, which no one but them ever let me do. We sang songs and laughed until the wee hours of the morning. I was the center of the world when I was there. They made cassette tapes of me telling stories about "Brier Bear and Brier Rabbit" that I had memorized and singing my Christmas songs from church. They would let me fix their hair, dress up in their jewelry and make-up, and play waitress, writing down their "orders" on a pad of paper and bringing them coffee. Every New Year we all went out into the street and banged the pots and pans, honked the car horns, and screamed "Happy New Year!" in voices as loud as we could muster. They would tell me all kinds of stories about when they were young, growing up in Crab Orchard and then in Louisville.

They talked about the years during the war and going to G.I. dances. Those 2 were attached at the hip. I think they were definitely the kind of chicks I would have been great friends with had we all been adults together. My favorite story they used to tell is one where they were all gussied up, heading to one of the G.I. dances. Somehow, they had gotten their hands on a convertible and took off down the road. When they got a steady speed going, they realized their hair was getting messed up. So, while driving down the road, they somehow shimmied off their girdles and put them over their heads. Those two drove all the way from Louisville to Fort Knox with the top down and their girdles on their heads, waiving at passing cars and blowing kisses to the men! When they got to the dance, they put their girdles back on in the parking lot and headed in, as made up and gorgeous as ever.

They were beautiful, strong, wild and fun. Their strength, character and love have surely been a part of me being who I am. My Aunt Betts missed my grandma something fierce after she died and she talked about her all the time. My last memories of both of them are as frail, sick, old women in hospital rooms. But, that is not the women they were. They only became that way on the outside from the hands of time. Their insides never changed. A couple weeks ago when I went to the nursing home to see Aunt Betts, she was still laughing and flirting with the male workers. She was bragging to everyone that I was running for judge and that everyone should vote for her Ally.

Aunt Betts' birthday would have been Monday. Grandma's Birthday is today. Betts really gave Sug a wonderful Birthday present today when she peacefully died. I was there with her, as was her daughter Kim, a family friend, and her brother Guy's daughter, Sharolyn. Her favorite nephew, my dad, Gary was there most of the day, but stepped out for a bit when she did die. Her life ended surrounded by four ladies, just sitting around her bed talking and laughing, trying to forget why we were there. Aunt Betts was such a social butterfly, she wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

Uncle Guy died this past November and Aunt Betts was too sick to go to his funeral. I can only imagine how badly that broke her heart. After that, she was the last of this wild crew left here with us. I remind myself when I wish she were still alive that I am being selfish. She wouldn't want us all to be sad today, but to celebrate. To celebrate our lives, our loves, our families and friends. I know heaven is rockin' tonight as the whole gang is back together. I imagine them there, Guy, Bernard, Sug, Betts, and Uncle Dick, looking like young angels, dancing and having a great Birthday and Welcome Home party.


Thank you to all of them for the impact their love and support has had on me. I am a better person for having known them all, even if only for a short time. I know they are smiling down on me tonight and singing proudly a song I remember them singing at that kitchen table in Aunt Betts' house, "Oh when we all get to Heaven, what a day of rejoicing that will be. When we all see Jesus, we'll sing and shout the Victory"! Congratulations on your Victory Grandma Aunt Boots. Thank you for letting me be there to rub your hair and kiss your cheek and say "goodbye" before you died. I love you very much and I will see you and grandma in my dreams, I am sure.